You May Say That I'm A Socialist, But I'm Obviously Not The Only One

I've been having a lot of thoughts lately, partly about the baby but also about a lot of other things related to what it's really like to think about having a baby in this country.

Now, first of all, let me be all sunshine and roses here and say that yes, I understand that I'm living in a medically-advanced country, I am lucky to have health care that allows me to meet all my prenatal needs inexpensively, and I am, frankly, lucky to be a middle-class white, educated, married, employed woman of 28 giving birth to her first child. I am lucky that we got pregnant easily, lucky that I have a wonderful, supportive, loving, employed, educated husband, family, and group of friends, and lucky that I have a job that will allow me to work until I give birth and then take off 3 months with my new baby. I am lucky that I will probably not die in childbirth, lucky that my baby will have immediate access to the best medical care should something go wrong, and lucky that I've been tested all over the place during this pregnancy to ensure that nothing, so far, has gone wrong during womb-time, which makes me lucky all over again.

So, what have I done to deserve all this? Sure, I've made relatively good life choices--going to college, avoiding street drugs, getting married to the right person--but the most important things that eventually led me to this lucky place have been purely circumstantial. I just happened to be born to two married, white parents who wanted me. My parents and extended family gave me every educational advantage--they read to me, encouraged my studies, gave me educational toys, limited my TV, and fed me a balanced diet. I was lucky to be born into this fortuitous situation, and did nothing "right" to deserve this place in life.

So, I'm having a baby, and I'm lucky to have the care that I have. But what about the people who weren't so lucky--the ones who didn't have a loving and supportive family? The ones whose parents didn't have enough money or time or knowledge to give them all the advantages I've enjoyed? The ones who, now, don't have access to the health care that I have access to, but are facing the same new motherhood I am?

My sister-in-law and her husband recently gave birth to a gorgeous baby girl who arrived about 6 weeks early. She didn't have to worry about the medical bills that may have resulted in the birth of a preemie, and will have a year off to bond with, breastfeed, and care for her baby. She will not have to make the difficult decision of putting her tiny baby into a day care center until the baby is almost walking. She and her husband won't have to worry about balancing new parenthood and work for a year. They will also, as a side note, not have to worry about putting away money for their baby's college education. Their lucky position in life comes from the fact that they were born in a country with universal health care, nearly-free education, and liberal maternity leave.

Why is it that access to things like maternity leave, higher education, and health care are dependent on luck? What have we done wrong as a country to allow luck to be a major deciding factor in a person's ability to access life's necessities? And why do we allow those who have been lucky to make sweeping political changes that affect those who have not?

It is my strong belief, now more than ever, that we need, need, need to reform our health care system even more, and I believe we need to offer universal care. And to start this, we, the lucky in America, need to acknowledge our vastly unearned positions and stand up for the ones who have not been so fortunate. We need to create a country that uses tax money to enhance the life of the people who live here, and to care for people who need extra assistance. As an almost-mother, I want nothing more than to bring my baby into a world that provides security, not anxiety, and opportunities rather than financial burdens and fear.